📕 Part 1: Make-up

Rory, do you wear make-up?

Well, no, I don't think it's very common for men. Actually, the first last and only time I've ever worn makeup was about 15 years ago when I did some modeling for a friend. And that was the strangest experience. The makeup that used felt like it was like, like wall paint being applied to my face. You could feel it like filling the pores. It wasn't very nice.

What does wearing make-up mean to you?

Well, I'm not quite sure what you mean. If we're talking about what it involves. Then we could talk about doing your eyelashes applying lipstick, wearing concealer. If you're talking about who or what it's for, I think it's mostly about enhancing female attributes, especially on the face, though that's probably very Western way of seeing it, I suppose.

Do you give make-up as a gift?

Oh, I think I have a very long time ago. But it's not something I usually buy since I'm not exactly au fait with cosmetics. I'm much better at books or jewelry.

What do you think when you see a man wearing make-up?

Well, I imagine it depends on the kind. A lot of actors wear make-up and it's quite important for how they work with a camera as I understand it. And then sometimes male actors and pantomimes wear overblown amounts of it for a comedic effect. And I think some drag performers wear women's make-up as part of their personas for similar reasons.

What about a woman? If a woman wears make-up, what do you think?

Well, I was talking about this with one of my friends the other day, actually, and like people tend to notice more if women don't wear make-up than if they do. Apparently women look really different without their make-up. And I've seen a lot of my female friends without make-up, and they do look like a lot different in some cases.

Do you think too much make-up on a woman, is it okay? On the woman's face, let's say.

Well, it's ultimately her choice, isn't it? Like people can do what they like with their bodies, can't they? I suppose if you wear too much make-up, it's not good for your skin is it? And that's a concern. And there's other times when people in my country wear so much fake tan that they look like Oompa Loompas. And that's not good. I just don't think it's a healthy look. I don't really understand what people get out of looking like that. Maybe they see themselves differently, but I don't think it's a good look. That's just my opinion, though. Who cares what I think, it's their face. -

Thank you, Rory, for your honest answers. I hope you haven't made them up. Have you?

Oh, it's a pun.

It's a pan, yeah, because we're talking about make-up. Make-up - it's usually on a woman's face or on a person's face. Make-up. And to make something up is to create, to what? To lie about something. Just make it up, you know, to create something. Yep.

Enhance.

Enhance. What?

Some people think make-up is like a form of deception. But people who argue against it say...

Right, yeah, yeah. I didn't lie to you, darling. It was just half-truth.

Although I don't think like, sometimes it's clearly a lie. Like there's a famous singer. She's very talented. She's called Beth Ditto and she wears lots of make-up. And without it it's not great. Sorry, Beth, if you're listening, but it's true. She'd probably agree.

Okay, interesting. Yeah, so that's an interesting topic if, like you are a man, and you are asked about make-up, which is okay, you know. So you can get your way around it, right, and talk about make-up in general, and about women. So, first of all, we wear make-up. Alright? Wear make-up.

It's like clothes, you also put it on.

And make-up we spell it like make then we have...What do you call this little thing between make and up?

A hyphen.

Yes.

It's hyphenated.

Hyphenated word. Yay. So make-up. We can say, dear ladies and gentlemen, we can say I put on a little eye make-up for example, so I put on make-up. I wear make-up.

Is it eyeshadow, is it mascara, is it eyeliner?

Hold your fire, Rory.

What's the difference between mascara and eye shadow?

Wait, wait, wait. Hold your horses.

I have questions. I don't know what any of this is.

Wait first of all verbs, verbs. So, people wear make-up, they put on make-up, right? Then make-up could be heavy makeup. You can put on a lot of make-up. Right? Or you can wear a lot of make-up. Or you can call it thick make-up. Oh, she's wearing thick make-up. Rory talked about actors. Yeah, you can talk about actresses and actors wearing make-up. So we call it stage make-up.

Is it?

Yeah, you say oh, they're wearing stage make-up.

It's put on by the make-up department.

Yeah. Nice.

Rupert Everett talked about that in his book. He was like they used to. It's like it's not a huge amount but it makes a huge difference. They've said if you draw a small line on someone's chin, for example, it can change the way their face looks on camera. That's so cool.

Yeah, yeah, true. And, we apply make-up. Right? And Rory, I think you've used this verb.

Apply lipstick.

Yes. So we apply lipstick. It's interesting, like apply for a job, apply lipstick. Basically, put some lipstick on your lips, apply make-up. And then you can remove make-up. Right?

With make-up remover.

Yay. Yes. With some special makeup removing face wash. Yes. Yeah, I've got some make-up removing facewash it could be like organic. It could be fancy makeup removing facewash. You see, I'm using specific vocabulary, topic-specific vocabulary when I talk about make-up.

Still want to know what the difference between eyeshadow and mascara is.

So, there we go. Well, if you are a lady, right, or if you are a girl or a woman. So female. We can talk about different make-up. What, thingies that we have.

Products.

Mascara. Products. Yeah, there we go. We call it make-up products, and we can talk about our make-up kit. Make-up kits. This you know bag where you have all your make-up products. You have a make-up kit. Some people have small suitcases. These professional people, professional make-up people.

Make-up artist.

Make-up artists. Mascara, Rory, is what you put on your eyelashes, right? You can have black mascara, or green or brown. I have some green mascara by the way.

Now?

Now I'm wearing black mascara. So all your eyelashes, right? We call them eyelashes. Rory has beautiful eyelashes.

Yes.

Are you wearing any mascara?

No. It's all-natural. Just like the coincidences on our podcast.

We are talking about make-up.

I had to get that joke in somewhere.

Good, good, good. So mascara, then I can have eyeshadows. So eyeshadows is something that I put here on my eyes, not inside my eyes. Like, you know, here, eyeshadow.

This sounds really complicated.

Then I can have an eyeliner. So if I were to turn Rory into, you know, a singer, I would really use some eyeliner here. To kind of like, I would use black eyeliner for you. It would look good for you, you know, you will be gorgeous. Yeah.

But nevermind.

So do you remember this Placebo? So the singer from Placebo? He's wearing some eyeliner.

Yeah, but he's a millionaire, he can do what he likes.

Yeah. Oh, and also he's wearing some nail polish. Have you ever applied nail polish? Have you ever worn any nail polish?

Well, I think... I had a manicure like for the first time ever in my life a few weeks ago. And they put some stuff on but it wasn't nail polish. It was like some kind of preservative stuff. Anyway, the girl doing it did a great job. Thank you, Katarina in Domodedovo.

Hello. Thank you very much for taking care of our Rory. Yeah, we call it nail polish.

That's not nail polish, what I'm talking about, though. It's like preservative.

Yeah. Preservative or... What do you call it?

I don't know. Strengthening.

Yeah, to strengthen your nails.

Strengthening lotion.

Then, lipstick or lip gloss, right, so we call it a lip gloss. Also we have liquid foundation, foundation or concealer. Concealer, so if you have some, you know spots in the face you apply concealer. You can also have face powder. Again ladies just learn some words of the make-up products that you use.

That's such a great like tagline for our podcast.

Learn some words.

Learn some words. Would you?

No, but again, like, depending on what you're using, right, so I use all of this. All of the products.

Do you?

Oh yeah, I went to this professional make-up shop and I left like 30,000 rubles, and then I kind of felt like that seems quite a lot for some make-up.

I don't think I've ever spent 30,000 rubles on one thing in my life. Oh, yeah.

There we go.

But it wasn't make-up. It was champagne.

But, but, dear listener, it was on the 8 of March. So it's okay. Only 30,000 rubles, Rory? Only 30,000 rubles? What? You should have spent much more.

On champagne?

Yes. And flowers.

No. I shouldn't have. No, no.

Anyway, back to make-up. Yeah. So, Rory, you've used I think cosmetics. Did you use this cosmetics word? No? Well, you should have.

But the whole thing was about cosmetics.

Right, so we have the word cosmetics and we say cosmetics.

Oh, I did use the word cosmetics, I said I wasn't au fait with cosmetics.

Cosmetics, yeah. Cosmetics and make-up. Are they the same or are they different?

They overlap, make-up is a kind of cosmetic. But makeup is something that you've put on your face to enhance what's there. Cosmetics can also be things like moisturizer. I don't know what else because that's all I use.

Nail products, soaps, lotions, hair smoothing products.

Does face scrub comb.

What?

Face scrub.

Yeah, absolutely. Scrubs and tanning thingies and self-tanners and bronzes, any hair products, eye products, lipsticks. So that's like cosmetics in general, we say cosmetics, and it's always in the plural. Cosmetics, right?

Unless it's talking about products. Cosmetic products.

Cosmetic product. Yeah, very good, cosmetic products, but cosmetics. So if you're not into cosmetics, you can say okay, I'm not into make-up.

I think yeah, a lot of men will probably be totally lost to see when it comes to this. I looked at these questions, I was like, what am I gonna talk about it?

But again, talk about singers, talk about artists, talk about your friends, and do give make-up as a gift. Well, yeah, it's like, it's a common gift for a woman.

I would be very, I would be very careful about buying make-up for a woman because it could go horribly wrong. Couldn't it?

That's why you give a certificate. Okay? You put your 30,000 rubles into certificate and then the lady goes there and buys whatever she wants. Convenient. If you want to buy some cosmetics, or if you want to buy some beauty products, or you can make it yourself. Handmade soap.

How do you do that? Do you rend it from the fat of your enemies?

Fight club, yeah. Rory, you said that some drag performers wear women's make-up? Drag performers?

Yeah, well, I should have said drag queens, really. Because it's like that's, oh, this is complicated now.

Come on, tell us.

Well, drag queens are gay men that dress up and act as overblown female characters. And you can only be a drag queen if you're gay.

Okay, so a drag queen. But there's a word, a crossdresser.

A crossdresser can be a homosexual or a heterosexual man that dresses in women's clothing. But that's not for a performance, well, it could be for a performance.

For a performance, yeah.

But it doesn't necessarily have to be, maybe they just like the clothes. But it's interesting because it only applies to men, whereas women can wear men's clothes and it's totally normal. Like trousers, for example.

Trousers are unisex.

Well, yes, that's the point. What makes... This is an interesting question though. Like, why are for example, well, no, it's not. It's kind of normal actually. Because skinny jeans used to be only for women. And then men start to wear them and it was fine.

Hmm. Okay. Now live on this podcast. We're gonna choose some cosmetics for Rory. Rory, I'm gonna send you a link on Telegram now. And I'm going to ask you live for our listener to choose, let's choose five products. Okay, so the link is on Telegram now.

Oh god.

So, this is an online shop.

How much are they paying us to sponsor them? Nothing. Oh great, okay.

So Rory, I want you to just in one minute could you choose five beauty products for you. What you're going to buy.

For me?

For you. Yes, for you. So cosmetics, make-up, whatever makes you happy.

I just clicked on skincare and about a 100 options came up. What is this??

You should choose and give us the specific name, okay? Because this is a way of learning new vocabulary and checking up what do you call this thing and that thing. So Rory is now going to choose the product for himself. Okay, Rory. Where are you? Which category?

Oh my God. Well, I went for skincare because I actually know things about skincare. I went to, I opened up different things. I opened up night cream, face washing facial cleaner face masks, and then I went to cologne for men and fragrances.

Okay, fragrance.

Because I need some fragrances actually.

Yeah, fragrances - kind of like perfume.

Deodorant too. Did they not have deodorant? Deodorant. Awesome, awesome, awesome, because I like that. Cool. Okay, I've got five categories now. How much time do I have left?

Two minutes.

Great. Right. I've got one, I've got my five.

So what have you got, Rory? I have a deodorant stick from Sauvage.

Okay.

That's $25.

Yeah, deodorant stick is like for your armpits, right?

And of course it's out of stock. That's ridiculous. Why are you advertising something if it's out of stock?

So deodorant stick. Okay, what else?

So deodorant, you have a stick and a spray. A deodorant stick is the one that you rub onto your arms and a deodorant spray is the one that you spray under your arms. So don't get those confused.

Delicious.

Then I found now, oh God. What is this? It's called, the company name is Drunk elephant. And this is called a Protini polypeptide moisturizer. I think the Russian translation to that is "чепуха".

Moisturizer. This is the word that, well, this thing that moisturizes your skin. Moisturizer.

I think it's something that you put on at night.

Nice. Okay, on your face, right? So face moisturizer.

Then there's a superfood antioxidant cleanser from a company called Youth to the people.

Nice, cleanser. Cleanser is like a mask, right? Or some cream?

It's a lotion I think, actually, which means it's like a liquid. And you put that on your hands and rub it on your face and it's supposed to take away all the rubbish in your pores. Your pores, by the way, are parts of your well they're in your skin. It's where the sweat comes from and they open and close. And if you have a shower, it's a good idea to have a hot shower first to wash out your pores and then turn the temperature down so they close again. And that stops you from getting spots. I can't remember who told me that. Then I have watermelon glow hydrochloric clay pour tight facial mask.

Okay. A watermelon facial mask. That would be enough.

Yeah, I'm guessing it does something to your pores. It keeps your pores tight. Because if you have big pores. It's not good, right.

Yeah, we should shut them down. Shut up your pores. Yeah, so we call it facial masks. Or you can call face masks, but facial is much better.

And the last thing I have is, it's called a spice bomb. Infra-red "eau de parfum". No, it's a fragrance.

Fragrance.

It looks like a grenade.

Hmm. So like perfume?

Yeah, it's got a cool design actually.

Yeah, perfume for men is called fragrance or we can call it cologne. Cologne.

Or "eau de parfum".

No, Rory, you're all set with cosmetics. Are you happy now?

Well, not really because the spice bomb is $110, this glow clay facial mask is $40, the superfood antioxidant cleanser is $36. I'm basically broke. $68 for this moisturizer?

Dear listener, all the money that we are getting from premium episodes are going in Rory's cosmetics.

No, they're not. I'm not paying for that. No!

Please subscribe to our premium and buy our phrasal verb Podcourse, so Rory can afford some make-up and cosmetics.

I'd never buy anything like that. I'm quite happy with my moisturizer from Nivea.

Oh, for 50 rubles? 100 rubles?

It's 654.

600? Wow.

Rubles? That's like six pounds. That's not that much.

Wow. Dear listener, how are you? Are you okay? Hopefully, we've just brushed up your make-up vocabulary together with cosmetics vocabulary. And Rory did some online shopping.

And now I'm broke.

Thank you very much for listening!

Bye!

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