📙 Part 2: Describe an argument that two of your friends had

This episode's vocabulary

Even-keeled (adjective) – calm and emotionally stable. → Most of my pals are pretty even-keeled.

Row (noun) – a serious argument or fight. → They don’t really get into rows with one another.

Spat (noun) – a short, petty argument. → The occasional light-hearted spat.

Blow-up (noun) – a sudden and intense argument. → Two of my friends had a massive blow-up.

Behind someone’s back (phrase) – without someone’s knowledge, in a dishonest way. → He said something behind the other's back.

Aftermath (noun) – the consequences or results of a bad event. → I just witnessed the aftermath of their argument.

Have a go at (phrase) – to criticize or argue with someone angrily. → They were having a go at each other over various things.

Pick sides (phrase) – to choose one person or group in an argument. → I didn’t want to pick sides.

Fall out (phrasal verb) – to have a serious argument and stop being friends. → They fell out after the argument.

Make up (phrasal verb) – to become friends again after an argument. → I hope one day they'll make up.

Disagreement (noun) – a situation where people have different opinions. → A small disagreement turned into a big fight.

Misunderstanding (noun) – a failure to understand correctly. → The whole issue started with a misunderstanding.

Confrontation (noun) – a face-to-face conflict or challenge. → There was a tense confrontation between them.

Reconciliation (noun) – the act of making peace after a conflict. → Their reconciliation made everyone feel relieved.

Grudge (noun) – a persistent feeling of resentment. → He held a grudge for months after the argument.

Questions and Answers

Maria: You should say when it happened, what it was about, how it was solved, and how you felt about it.

Rory: Well, most of my pals are pretty even-keeled, so they don't really get into rows with one another beyond, I don't know, the occasional light-hearted spat. But this one time I can recall two of my friends having a massive blow-up over something one of them had apparently said behind the other's back. This must have been about, oh, a year ago now? At least a year or so ago, I think, because I can barely remember the details. But as far as I'm aware, one friend hadn't been saying terribly nice things about the other when they weren't around.

As for what exactly it was they said, I have no idea, because I wasn't involved, I just witnessed the aftermath, the huge row that ensued when one of them found out about it. It was extremely awkward to be between two people having a go at each other over various things because I actually liked both of them, and I didn't really want to pick sides. We're all men in our thirties, so doing that would have been a bit like high school, and that's a bit silly.

As with all such things. It started off being about that, and then escalated as other past grievances were aired and people fell out with each other. I wish I could say it was all sorted out in the end, after everyone got it out of their systems, but actually, they haven't spoken to each other since then. Or about each other, aside from the occasional off-remark.

When it comes to how I feel about it, I'm a bit sad to be honest, because it seems like such a waste of a good friendship, and I don't really like seeing people falling out in general, but especially over things that we really should have left behind in our high school years. I hope one day they'll make up and we can all become friends again. If it hadn't happened, it would have avoided a whole load of stress for me and everyone else who was involved.

Discussion

Maria: Hey! Thank you, Rory, for your story. So, dear listener, the topic is: Describe an argument. Argument? Some disagreements that your friends had. A row, disagreement, or some conflict. My friends or my pals. My pals, meaning my friends. And Rory, you’ve used this “keeled”. So my pals are pretty even-keeled.

Rory: Oh, even-keeled just means even-tempered.

Maria: Ooh, even-keeled, wow. Or you can say that they are even-tempered. So they are always calm, they are never angry or too excited, so they are like calm and nice, even-tempered. So they don't really get into rows. A row is a very good synonym for argument, so they don't go into rows.

Rory: You always get into an argument or into a row, and you get out of them too.

Maria: So my friends don't often have rows, so they don't often have arguments or fights. Also, a fight could be another synonym. So my friends don't really get into fights, like disagreements with one another. What is a light-hearted spat? Spat.

Rory: Just friendly arguing. A spat is a small argument, but it's nothing very serious.

Maria: Yeah, like a short argument, usually about something that is not important. So my friends had a spat about the weather, for example. Or I had a spat with my brother about food, something like, not really important. So my friends usually have light-hearted spats, but they don't really argue. But one time I can recall, so I can recall, I can remember. I can recall two of my friends having a massive blow-up over something. And here it becomes serious. So a blow-up is a serious argument. And to blow up means to suddenly become very angry. So, like my friend blew up, he became really angry. And to have a blow-up, to have a sudden argument. So two of my friends had a massive blow-up over something.

Rory: The over, and then the topic they're talking about. So a blow-up over, oh, I don't know, chores, a blow-up over money.

Maria: Politics, religion, you know, dangerous topics.

Rory: Other things we don't discuss on this podcast.

Maria: And one of my friends had said something behind the other's back. So say something behind the other person's back. It means that you don't say things directly to a person's face. You say things about this person, but to other people. So behind their back. And this is not really nice. And here we use the past perfect, dear listener. They had an argument because one of them had said something behind the other's back. Probably this was about a year ago. Or you can say this must have been about a year ago. I don't really remember, but probably, 90%, it was about a year ago. It must have been, it must have been a year ago.

Rory: And that's very important. Oh, that's very important because you might not remember things very well. So saying things like must have been, might have been, will be very important. How many people remember the details of their arguments with their friends?

Maria: No, they don't. And you can say I can barely remember the details. Like, I don't remember all the details. I can barely remember.

Rory: Oh, and the other thing, we're talking about inexact periods of time. A year ago or so, about a year ago.

Maria: As for what exactly they said, I have no idea. So you may not know the reason why your friends argued, but they just argued. Or you can make it up. They argued over, I don't know, politics. I wasn't involved. I wasn't part of this argument. So I wasn't involved in the argument. Or you can say that my two best friends were involved in the argument. I just witnessed the huge row. So I saw how they argued. I was a witness. I witnessed. I observed the argument. And here we use row, like, argument. And I just witnessed the huge row, the row that they had. My two friends were having a go at each other. So if you have a go at a person, you kind of, you scream and you shout.

Rory: And generally make a drama out of something.

Maria: Yeah. So they were having a go at each other over various things. Or they were having a go at each other over politics. I like both of my friends. So I didn't want to pick sides. When you pick sides, you decide, ah, I support this friend or I support that friend. So who you support.

Rory: Which is a very childish way to live your life.

Maria: And if you don't want to choose one person, you just say, I didn't want to pick sides. I like both of them. The argument escalated. It became more dramatic, more passionate. To escalate means to make something become greater or more serious. His problems escalated. Like the argument escalated into a full-blown conflict, into a serious conflict. So the argument escalated as my friends aired their past grievances. So grievances, complaints, strong feelings. They expressed their grievances, their complaints. Or they aired their past grievances. Air, something, it means to express. Like I aired my opinion. I expressed my opinion. Air, like we breathe air, you know, like this air. So they aired their opinions or they aired their grievances. And then Rory used a phrasal verb. Rory, you said like fell out with each other. What did you mean?

Rory: Oh, is that a phrasal verb? Or is that a multi-word, multi-phrase verb?

Maria: No, it's a phrasal verb. Fall out.

Rory: Really? Anyway, if you fall out with people, then your relationship becomes compromised. And you're not friends anymore.

Maria: Fall out means to argue with someone and stop being friendly with them. So my two friends fell out with each other. Or they fell out over some political matters. They fell out over a girl. Super synonym. So you can start off on your talk like this. I'm gonna tell you a story about how my best friends fell out with each other. How they argued. It was all sorted out in the end. So if you had a happy ending, like they made peace. They kind of hugged each other like yay. So it was all sorted out in the end. Or it wasn't sorted out in the end. So they didn't become friends. They fell out. It didn't sort it out in the end.

Oh, I just realised I had a missed opportunity to use another interesting phrasal verb. Because if you fall out with people, then the relationship is compromised. But the opposite of that is “make up with”.

Maria: So they didn't make up with each other, right?

Rory: Well, they didn't make up.

Maria: They didn't make up. Yeah, so they didn't make peace. Because after an argument, you either make peace or you keep fighting, right? So they didn't make up. Or they made up. When it comes to how I feel about it. I'm sad. I'm a bit sad. A bit, like a little sad. I'm upset. And you can say like, well, to be honest with you, dear examiner. I'm upset. I'm sad about this situation, about this row. I don't like seeing people falling out. Like, I don't like to see how people argue with each other. So the structure is I don't like seeing people falling out, arguing. I hope that one day they'll make up. Oh, you did use the phrase, you see?

Rory: Did I?

Maria: Yeah, make up. Yeah, you see, make up like make peace. And to finish this monologue, you can say, I hope one day they will make up. They'll make up and we can all be friends again. Yay. So I'd like to avoid a whole load of stress. So, avoid a lot of stress.

Rory: Yes, that's describing the feelings about things. I should say, I said I was a bit sad. So a little bit sad. And then talking about how we could avoid stress, which is probably more advanced. And a whole load of stress is sort of the opposite to a bit sad. Because there's a tiny bit sad and then there's a big bit of stress there. Oh, and it's a conditional sentence. Right.

Maria: Thank you very much for listening. And we'll get back to you in our next episode about arguments and communication.

Rory: Oh, God.

Maria: Bye.

Rory: Bye.

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