📘 Part 3: Colleagues

This episode's vocabulary

To empathize (verb) - to be able to understand how someone else feels.

To collaborate (verb) - to work with someone else for a special purpose.

Attribute (noun) - a quality or characteristic that someone or something has.

Flexibility (noun) - the ability to change or be changed easily according to the situation.

Toxic (adj.) - very unpleasant or unacceptable.

Prophylactic (adj.) - preventing disease.

Likeable (adj.) - A likeable person is pleasant and easy to like.

Competent (adj.) - able to do something well.

Abrasive (adj.) - rude and unfriendly.

To be capable of something/doing something (phrase) - having the ability, power, or qualities to be able to do something.

To self-regulate (verb) - to control yourself.

To determine (verb) - to control or influence something directly, or to decide what will happen.

To underpin (verb) - to give support, strength, or a basic structure to something.

Conducive (adj.) - providing the right conditions for something good to happen or exist.

Anecdotal (adj.) - anecdotal information is not based on facts or careful study.

To draw in(to) (something) (idiom) - to attract someone or something.

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Questions and Answers

M: What do you think makes someone a good colleague?

R: Shared sense of purpose and vision in work terms. And in personal terms, having a good sense of humour and an ability to communicate and empathize well are useful. You have to be able to collaborate well, and these skills and attributes should allow that to happen.

M: What matters most about a colleague's personality?

R: I think that will depend on the business and situation, though being reasonably organized and helpful would be useful normally. Of course, there are different ways to be helpful. And in a company, you have to work together. So there's enough flexibility in there that it should always count for something.

M: Is having good colleagues, the most important thing about a job?

R: It's not the be-all and end-all. But it's definitely in my top five. If I didn't like the people I worked with, I would leave. And I think that's true for everyone. No one wants to work in a toxic environment that makes you feel terrible all the time and good colleagues are a great prophylactic against that.

M: Are good colleagues important at work?

R: Isn't this just the same as the last question? Regardless, yes, they are. I wouldn't be without mine. And I'm sure others would say the same, assuming they work with other people, which almost everyone does.

M: How can workers build good relationships with their colleagues?

R: That will depend entirely on the context, though a few common factors would be being likeable and competent. Nobody wants to work with someone who cannot do their job, nor do they want to work with people who are abrasive and rude. There are some exceptions to this, but you have to be one extreme or the other to get away with it. And I don't think most people are capable of that.

M: Does it matter if a child likes or doesn't like their classmates?

R: It shouldn't matter. But so often it does, since children are still learning how to work with others and self-regulate, which means they can't always cope with working with others in their group that they can't stand. That's important, since that can determine whether outcomes of a task or project will be successful or not.

M: How can teachers help their students get along?

R: Modeling appropriate behaviour helps. They need to show what successful working relationships look like as well as what underpins them. It also helps to have an environment that's conducive to it with lots of opportunities to work together.

M: In your country, do people often build close relationships with their colleagues?

R: I'm not sure how you would even begin to measure that, though, it certainly couldn't hurt to try and do that. The older generations seem to reference their relationships with their colleagues more, whereas young people do it less often. Though, it's all anecdotal evidence, really.

M: What people are popular at work?

R: Well, like I said before, competent and likeable people. You have to be able to do your job at least reasonably well. And you have to be able to work with others to get anywhere. If I had anything to add to that, I would say, attractive or funny people, since that tends to draw people in most social situations, not just work.

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Discussion

M: So you said a shared sense of purpose and vision. Vision of what? Like eyes?

R: No, like a shared understanding of where you are going and what the future should look like of the company that you're working in.

M: Yeah, so you and your colleagues should have a shared sense of purpose. Purpose, like aim, goals, and vision. Vision like for the future where you're going. Also having a good sense of humour, and the ability to communicate and empathize. Okay? So when you empathize, what do you do?

R: Oh... Do you know what? I've said that and then I forgot the difference between empathize and sympathize. But it's to do with sharing or understanding people's feelings, basically, isn't it?

M: Yeah. Yeah, empathy. And then you have to be able to collaborate well with your colleagues. So to work together with them well, and check out the modal verbs here. You have to be able to do it. So kind of to be able, so you can do it. And here, Rory uses like double trouble. Double modal verb, if I can say so. So you have to be able. Kind of you have to can do it. But you can't say can. You have to be able to work well together with your colleagues to collaborate well with them. When you speak about colleagues' personality, you should use different adjectives to describe personal traits. So character traits, personality traits, like being organized. Like colleagues should be helpful, organized. They have to work together. And so there's enough flexibility. So they should be flexible. What else can we say about colleagues' personality? Helpful, organized, friendly.

R: Industrious.

M: Oh, industrious, yeah. Hardworking, yeah? So industrious. But also fun. I don't know, like easygoing, perhaps.

R: Yeah. Well, I mean, like, we could use all of these. It depends on what your personal beliefs are. But like, if you're a colleague, then you're working together. So being helpful and being organized helps you do that. I don't know if being fun always helps, though. So it just depends.

M: I think so. I think being fun is about like a good sense of humour. Like to be easygoing and not depressed and all this, like negativity, you know, whinging, moaning about... The weather is horrible. Low pay, I hate my boss, you know, all this stuff.

R: Well, it wouldn't help me. I hate it when people complain. Like, I can't stand it.

M: Yeah, that's why you worked at this language centre I used to work for such a long time, right? People never complained about anything there.

R: In fairness, the balance of complaining to not complaining was significantly in favour of people not complaining at the time.

M: Really? Really? Oh, wow. So you worked with some good people? Oh...

R: In my case, I feel like I did quite a good job. No? Do you not think so?

M: Wow. Well, you did a marvellous job.

R: Well, you did too.

M: No.

R: Yes.

M: No.

R: You don't think so?

M: No, I don't think so. No, I used to, maybe at some point.

R: I used to before I stopped caring.

M: Well, exactly. This is what happened.

R: Maybe that's one thing that we could add, like caring or being personally invested in the company.

M: Ooh, yeah. Yeah, so caring, caring colleagues, like those who... Something does matter. It kind of it makes a difference to them. They care. Caring colleagues.

R: I thought like, I found that you were quite like that.

M: Well, that was my job. To make a good impression that I did.

R: To give the impression that I cared.

M: No, but at some point, I did care, but then due to certain events and people I just like, seriously?

R: Why are you looking at me?

M: I'm just... Then I saw Rory in his torn jeans.

R: And I decided that standards had fallen so far.

M: I was like, what? Him?

R: God. I cannot believe that I went as far as I did. That's amazing.

M: Oh, you're cute. Yeah. Good times. Good times.

R: I was cute. But now I'm, now I'm just horrendous.

M: Dear listener, how are you doing? We went on a huge tangent. So we kind of we spoke off-topic. Yeah. Because we have some history with Rory working at the same language school. So yeah, sorry about that. Let's go back to our colleagues. So good colleagues, are they the most important thing about a job or not? And Rory, you said, it's not the be-all and end-all.

R: Yes, it's an idiom, meaning it's not the most important thing that all other things depend on.

M: Give us another sentence.

R: Making lots of money is not the be-all and end-all.

M: The be-all and end-all. So the be-all and end-all... It's very bizarre. So the be-all, so be all, and end all. Crazy. The most important thing, for example, like we all agreed that winning was not the be-all and end. So winning was not the most important thing. Wow, dear listener, so band 9. Do you feel it? And then we continue with the second conditional. Surely, if I didn't like the people I work with, I'd leave. So if I didn't like. We're imagining. But I do love the people I work with, I would leave.

R: Well, we're imagining in general, though, if I didn't like the people I worked with. Like this is just in any situation, isn't it? It's not just if I didn't like the people I work with in the present, it's in the past. And that's true. If I don't like where I work, then I leave. That's it.

M: Yep. No one wants to work in a toxic environment. Right? So this toxic working environment, negative environment. When people complain all the time, they're negative. Toxic environment. They gossip all the time. And you did use some fancy word like...

R: Prophylactic is just something you do to protect against disease. So a toxic work environment can make you stressed out and miserable. So that's going to affect your health. So prophylactic against that it's just leave, walk out the door. Don't go back.

M: Yeah, like prophylactic is something from medical sphere. Prophylactic treatment, for example. We build good relationships with our colleagues. And we can also say we get along well with our colleagues. That's a phrasal verb. So to have good relationships with your colleagues, to get along well with your colleagues, or you just say, I get along with my colleagues, I get along with all my friends. And then Rory's favourite technique, well, one of his favourite techniques is "that will depend entirely on the context".

R: Well, it will. Everything depends entirely on the context. I mean, if you're working on entirely online, and you never meet the people that you work with, physically, then you can't exactly have parties to get together. So you would need to do something else to build relationships.

M: And then you mentioned a couple of common factors. How to build good relationships with your colleagues? Like to be likeable and to be competent. So if I'm likeable, people like me.

R: Well, yeah, you create an atmosphere where people like you.

M: I'm lovable. Love me. Love me. And I'm competent. So competent, like a professional, I have some knowledge, skills, I'm competent. In what I'm doing?

R: You can be competent in what you do. But I would say competent at what you do.

M: I'm competent at this job. There are some exceptions to this. So an exception to the rule. Right? So there are rules. And there's this one thing that doesn't follow the rule, we call it an exception. And preposition is there are some exceptions to something. Oh, and also you've used another adjective, is abrasive. People who are abrasive.

R: People that, well, you meet them, and they're very standoffish, and you don't feel like they're immediately likeable or interested in you. So it's just like, do your job. Get it done. And don't talk to me until you do your job. Like that's quite abrasive.

M: I also asked you, if good colleagues are important at work, and you used a question to react to this question.

R: Well, I mean, it was the same as the last question, isn't it?

M: Yeah, yeah.

R: What was the last question? Is having good colleagues the most important thing? Are good colleagues important at work? So I suppose maybe it's not talking about whether they're the most important thing. But like, still, it's pretty close. So a reaction like, is that not just the same as the last question? And then before the examiner can react and change anything just say regardless, so like, moving on, yes, they are. And then there's an expression I wouldn't be without mine. So if you wouldn't be without something, it's like you need it. If you had the choice, then you must have it with you. I wouldn't be without Vanya or Maria.

M: Yeah... I wouldn't be without Rory. Classmates are people you study with at school or university. You can also call them group mates, I think, at university, yeah? Classmates are usually at school. And if a child doesn't like their classmates? Or likes their classmates. Does it matter? And here we can talk about how children should self-regulate. So I wonder, how can a child self-regulate? Can they really self-regulate? Are they like robots? Okay, little Boris, you should self-regulate yourself. Like stop it. Control yourself.

R: Well, self-regulation is not about... It's not about behaving like a robot. It's just about being reasonably in control of your behaviour, you know. No one 100% self-regulates, we all get a bit out of balance sometimes. But a lot of children I worked with, they're pretty good. They're like, oh, yeah, I'm a little bit bored, but I'll keep going, I don't mind. And then, or they just, they're very happy to be around other people and they don't mind working with other people.

M: And then, sometimes children can't always cope with working with others. So they can't work with certain people. So they can't cope with working. They can't deal with working with others. And they can't work with other people who they can't stand. So children can't stand certain people. They hate them. They don't like them. They dislike them. Ooh, I can't stand it, I dislike them. Teachers can help students to get along. So remember this phrasal verb? So I get along well with my colleagues, I get along with my friends. To have a good relationship with. And Rory told us that teachers should model appropriate behaviour. So when you model behaviour, you just set an example of good behaviour.

R: Yeah, I mean, you show how to do something.

M: Or you can be a role model also, that would be a nice phrase here. So teachers should be role models. And model appropriate behaviour. Underpins. To underpin something.

R: But that just means the thing that sits underneath to support something.

M: But that's a high-level word, I think.

R: What underpins a successful relationship? Good communication, a sense of fun, a shared sense of purpose and meaning.

M: Yeah. So teachers should model successful working relationships and should model what underpins them, what supports them. An environment that is conducive to learning.

R: Yeah, conducive. It just means an environment that encourages and supports learning.

M: Yeah, so teachers should create an environment, a studying environment that is conducive to learning, that encourages students to learn. We can build close relationships with our colleagues, right? Or we can be quite far from our colleagues.

R: You can be far away and still have a close relationship.

M: And Rory talked about the older generation. So the older generation seem to what, be closer to their colleagues, yeah? And here you can contrast the older generation, whereas young people. So the older generation, seem to be closer to the colleagues whereas (but) young people do so less often. So they're less often close to their colleagues. And then Rory says, that's all anecdotal evidence. Right? So these are not facts. There hasn't been any research. So Rory, just I think made it up. I don't know.

R: I didn't make it up.

M: Well, you read it on the internet.

R: I didn't read anything on the internet. I was just thinking about my experience talking to people. That's what anecdotal evidence is. It's evidence based on my experience.

M: Yeah, you see, so that's anecdotal evidence.

R: Yeah. It's not like... It's just...

M: Based on pretty much nothing.

R: No, not based on nothing. Human experience is important. But you have to acknowledge that you're only one person and your experiences don't match up with the rest of the world's.

M: Yes. So kind of like only your life experience, that's anecdotal evidence. Kind of like a joke, you know, like an anecdote, a joke. A very good phrase is "like I said before". So if you did say something, and then the examiner asks you kind of a question, and you want to repeat yourself, don't say like, oh, as I've told you before, as I've said. Like I said before, like I said before. Like I said before, competent and likeable. Because Rory did mention competent and likeable people earlier, right? So it's okay to repeat your answer. Why not? Like I said before, competent and likeable people are popular at work. And then again, you have to be able to do your job. Double trouble, right? So double modal verb. You have to do something, and be able to do it. Kind of you should be able to do your job. And then the second conditional, if I had to add anything to that, I'd say that attractive and funny people are popular at work. Yay! Yeah, and actually, there has been some research about the issue of attractiveness. And they compared like, attractive people, like beautiful people. Yeah, like really attractive people with less attractive people. And what was the result? Like people thought that attractive people are more... Are kind of are smarter than less attractive people? Or no? What do you think?

R: Now, there is something about this because in some situations, attractive people are perceived to be less competent.

M: Really?

R: In some, yeah.

M: The research says that, like when we see an attractive person, we think that they are smarter, and they are like more competent.

R: But there are some circumstances in which the opposite is the case.

M: Ah, it's kind of like a blonde girl, you know, like a beautiful blonde girl. No, she doesn't know anything.

R: That's what you said. That's not what I said.

M: And she's a lawyer. She's like a PhD in biology or chemistry.

R: Why would you be a lawyer with a PhD in Biology and Chemistry? That doesn't sound like somebody who's very in control of their lives.

M: No, they're so smart like, like she did it for fun, you know, like first law degree and then she goes like, no, biology, chemistry, because that's the future and yeah.

R: It's kind of logical if you think about it. Like if someone is good-looking, you'll probably want to get to know them better. And therefore, you will draw in more people. I think that's just a fact. As long as you're not like attractive, and also horrible. You know?

M: Yeah, yeah. So like draw more people in.

R: Is that a phrasal verb?

M: Oh, yeah. So people are drawn to this person, to this attractive person. So I would say attractive and funny people draw people in. Right? So that's why attractive and funny people are usually popular at work. Also positive people, easygoing people. Yeah, who have this, you know, "hey-hey" about themselves. Like Rory and I. Yeah?

R: Yes. We're modest as well.

M: Oh, we are super modest. No, it's just facts. They're just facts. I'm stating facts. We're quite popular, because we're funny. Especially my jokes. Dear listener, do remember this Matryoshka joke? What's wrong with Matryoshkas? Russian dolls. They're so full of themselves. Thank you very much for listening! We hope that you do have nice colleagues! And...

R: We'll see you next time. Bye!

M: Bye!

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