📘 Part 3: Making decisions

This episode's vocabulary

Culturally sensitive (adjective) – respecting the differences between cultures. → It's important to be culturally sensitive when discussing traditions.

Individually sensitive (adjective) – taking into account individual differences. → The teacher provided individually sensitive guidance for each student.

Powerless (adjective) – having no ability or authority to influence. → Teenagers often feel powerless in family disputes.

Progressively (adverb) – gradually, step by step. → He progressively improved his skills over the years.

Embrace (verb) – to accept or welcome something willingly. → She decided to embrace the challenge of moving abroad.

Individuality (noun) – the qualities that make someone unique. → Art classes encourage children to express their individuality.

Meaningful (adjective) – having real importance or value. → Volunteering for charity can be a meaningful experience.

No man’s an island (phrase) – nobody can live or succeed completely alone. → When managing a project, remember that no man’s an island.

Consult (verb) – to seek advice or information. → She consulted her mentor before making the decision.

Alternative perspective (phrase) – a different way of looking at something. → Listening to an alternative perspective can help solve problems.

Ill-advised (adjective) – not sensible or wise. → It was ill-advised to invest all his money in one stock.

Self-assured (adjective) – confident in one’s own abilities. → She was self-assured during the presentation.

Overconfident (adjective) – excessively sure of oneself. → He was overconfident and underestimated the difficulty of the exam.

Shy (adjective) – nervous or timid in social situations. → The shy student avoided answering questions in class.

Prudent (adjective) – showing careful judgment or wisdom. → It was prudent to save some money for emergencies.

Hesitant (adjective) – unsure or slow to act. → He was hesitant to speak in front of the large audience.

Seek guidance (phrase) – to look for advice or help. → Students often seek guidance from their teachers.

Decision-making (noun) – the process of making choices. → Good decision-making skills are essential in business.

Risk-averse (adjective) – unwilling to take risks. → She is risk-averse when it comes to financial investments.

Deliberate (verb) – to think carefully before making a decision. → The committee will deliberate before announcing the winner.

Questions and Answers

Maria: What important decisions should be made by teenagers themselves?

Rory: I suppose that's pretty culturally and individually sensitive, really. In some places, young people have the right to decide when to get married and who to get married to, and vote in government elections and have children. But elsewhere, they're pretty powerless. So I suppose it depends on the sort of society you want to have, really.

Maria: And could you give an example?

Rory: Well, at least in my society, we're supposed to value individual decisions and encourage people to embrace their individuality. So all of the key decisions in life could be made by teenagers as they progressively get older. So, for example, in my country, you can join the army and you can get married at the age of 16 and you can vote at the age of 18. So they're older teenagers, but they're still teenagers making these choices because they're choices that the individual makes for themselves.

Maria: What kind of decisions do you think are meaningful?

Rory: At least from my perspective, the ones that are actual exercises of individual power to improve your lives. So by that, I mean, they're like actions that allow you to make things better for yourself. So something like, I don't know, buying the latest phone to look cool isn't meaningful because it was decided for you by other people, whereas, oh, maybe joining a gym to improve your overall health and well-being. That is a meaningful decision because you did it for yourself and no one made you.

Maria: Why do some people like to ask others for advice?

Rory: Well, no man's an island, and you can't have perfect knowledge of everything. So it makes sense to consult with people who have some experience or who might have an alternative perspective to make sure you're not doing something really ill-advised.

Maria: Some people never ask anybody for advice. Why?

Rory: Well, there are a couple of possibilities. They could be really self-assured, not just without warrant. I mean, they might actually have the experience to allow them to make the decision easily. And so they're not worried about the opinions of other people. Or they could just be massively overconfident and know nothing. And then, of course, you have people who are quite shy and reserved in nature, and they don't want to ask for advice because they're afraid of looking silly or stupid. So that could prevent them from doing that.

Maria: Do people like to ask for advice more for their personal life or their work?

Rory: You'd have to ask them, frankly. I suppose it makes sense for them to ask about personal things, since there might be a fear of looking incompetent at work if you have to ask about things you should know more about because they're included in the purview of your job. By contrast, I can also see why people might not seek out other opinions on personal matters, maybe just to avoid embarrassment. But my own experience of people avoiding asking for advice has been in the workplace, for the reasons that I mentioned; they are worried about looking incompetent.

Maria: Why are some people unwilling to make quick decisions?

Rory: Some decisions can't be made hastily, can they? So it's probably just them being prudent or waiting for an ideal time. Of course, some people may be overly cautious, out of fear as well. But I think in general, people are more careful about these things rather than fearful.

Discussion

Maria: Ok, dear listener. So we make decisions. We make decisions, we decide something, and we make up our minds about something. Here we use the passive voice. So, some decisions should be made by teenagers or by children.

Rory: Or not. It depends on where you live. It’s culturally and individually sensitive. That just means it’s sensitive to the situation. Not emotionally, but it depends on the situation.

Maria: Teenagers, or young people, or young adults have the right to decide what to do. You can mention that they have the right to decide to get married or not, and vote in the elections. So voting, marriage, children, and, of course, it depends on our society. We can say that teenagers should make important or major decisions, crucial decisions, like important. Some difficult decisions could be made by their parents, or if not, teenagers could make wrong decisions, unwise decisions. But parents usually make rational, or more rational, decisions. These are the adjectives we use. Difficult decisions or tough decisions, and we also make decisions or we can take decisions. Meaningful decisions: if something is meaningful, it makes sense, it’s good for you.

Rory: Well, it’s psychologically good for you.

Maria: Useful. Useful, important, serious. Like, to have a meaningful relationship, or do something meaningful in life, something important and useful. And some decisions are meaningless, while others are meaningful. And here Rory gives us some examples. If a person makes a decision to improve their life, this is something meaningful for their life. And if a person buys the latest phone, the newest phone, to look cool, to look better than everybody else, it isn't meaningful, because it may not be your decision, but it has been decided by other people. But if you yourself decide to join a gym, or to start yoga, or to start learning English just for yourself, not for other people, but because you want, for your health, for your well-being, this is meaningful for you. And this decision has been made by you. And that's interesting. Is it your decision, or is it your parents' decision, Amazon's decision, Netflix's decision, that you should watch this film, or is it your decision?

Rory: It's the algorithm making decisions for us. There's a terrifying thought.

Maria: Yeah, that's true. Yeah, it is quite terrifying.

Rory: Now that we've terrified you, more grammar and vocabulary.

Maria: Everything, they've decided everything for you. What you will buy tomorrow, what you will watch tomorrow. Ah, crazy. When some people make a decision, they ask for advice. Careful, we use advice, not advices, ok, dear listener? Ask for advice, ask other people for advice, or ask for some tips. Tips of advice, meaning the same as advice. And here Rory uses an interesting phrase. No man is an island.

Rory: Hmm, it's a proverb, I think.

Maria: Oh, proverb, alright.

Rory: But it just means that no one is isolated and disconnected from everything. We are all related and linked somehow.

Maria: Yeah, and here Rory shows off his knowledge, because No Man is an Island is also a poem by English poet John Donne.

Rory: Is it?

Maria: No man is an island. Yeah, 1624.

Rory: I mean, of course, I knew that.

Maria: Rory, come on. And let's take a look, allpoetry.com. No man is an island. No man is an island, entire of itself. Every man is a piece of the continent, a part of the main. If a clod… ok, it gets complicated. So, yeah, no man is an island. So, pretty much we live together.

Rory: And we are all connected.

Maria: Yeah, we are all connected, we learn from each other, so, yeah. And it's normal to ask more knowledgeable people for advice. It makes sense to consult people with more experience than you. Consult people or ask them for advice.

Rory: We consult with people about things. Or we consult with people on something.

Maria: Or we consult people.

Rory: Oh, consult people, consult with people, consult with others, it's all there.

Maria: And some people might have an alternative perspective. So, a different view, a different approach to life. And they can help you out. And you should ask for advice from more knowledgeable people who know more than you. To make sure you are not ill-advised. If you are ill-advised, that means that you get a bad piece of advice. Like ill, ill advice, you know. Something not healthy, but ill, not wise. And it could cause problems in the future. Like an ill-advised career move. A wrong choice of career. People usually ask about personal life or work. And there might be a fear of looking incompetent at work. So, some people are afraid to ask for advice at work, not to look incompetent. Incompetent, like...

Rory: Like they know nothing or are not good at their job.

Maria: Yeah, like not having the ability to do something. Usually, we use this word with like an incompetent teacher, an incompetent doctor. The government is incompetent, so they don't know what they're doing.

Rory: They never know what they are doing.

Maria: Teachers, doctors, and the government, yes.

Rory: No, no, maybe just the government. Teachers always know what they are doing, question nothing.

Maria: People often seek out other opinions on personal matters. Seek out other opinions or ask for other opinions.

Rory: But that just means you're looking for them.

Maria: Some people are unwilling to make quick decisions. So, to be unwilling to do something when you don't want to do something. Like, some people are unwilling to ask for help. It's like really difficult for them to ask another person to help them out, right? They are unwilling to ask for advice, to ask for help, and to make quick decisions. Quick is like when you have to decide right away. Okay, where will we go on holiday? Bam! And you decide right away. Kind of rash decisions, snap decisions, quick decisions. And Rory paraphrases. Some decisions can't be made hastily, right? So, hastily, quickly.

Rory: Without thinking. Let's not be hasty.

Maria: Let's not be hasty. Let's not be in a hurry. Because when you do something hastily, you say or do something in a hurry without the necessary care or thought. Like, I acted too hastily, like too quickly, in a hurry. And our super tag question is here. Some decisions can't be made hastily. Can they? Or how do you say, can they? Can they? Can they?

Rory: Some decisions can't be made hastily, can they?

Maria: Can they? You see, so it's not a question, it's like, can they? It's a statement, like, mm-hmm, can they?

Rory: We never make hasty decisions. Always well-informed.

Maria: No, no, no. Always well-informed. Or we avoid making all the decisions. Prudent means careful and avoiding risks. So, it's always prudent to read a contract carefully before you sign it.

Rory: That must be a band 9 word, surely.

Maria: Prudent. Yeah, it doesn't say the level. Could you give us another sentence with prudent?

Rory: Oh, it's prudent to save some money every month.

Maria: Yeah. If something is not prudent, it's imprudent. And we say prudence is a noun, behaviour, that is careful and avoids risks. Financial prudence, for example, when you save money, you take care of your money. Some people might be overly cautious. So, like, cautious too much. Overly cautious. Like, too cautious. Out of fear. So, they're afraid. So, out of fear, they avoid making decisions.

Rory: Not us, though. We are fearless.

Maria: Fearless and prudent. Super knowledgeable and competent. We never ill-advise people. Especially you, dear listener, right? Hopefully now your head is booming with super decision vocabulary. Yes, go have a read about the bacteria in our guts that make decisions.

Rory: Who's really making the decisions here.

Yeah, exactly. Who is responsible for making all the decisions? Is it the brain, our stomach, our guts? Who makes the decisions and when? These are the questions. Thank you very much for listening. We love you. We hug you. Stay with us. Spread the word about us, right? And we'll take care of you in our next episode. All right? Bye!

Rory: Bye!

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