📘 Part 3: Talking

This episode's vocabulary

To talk something through (phrasal verb) - to discuss all the details of something, often before making a decision.

Sounding board (noun) - a person or group of people that you use to test something such as a new idea or suggestion to see if they will accept it or if they think it will work.

Interlocutor (noun) - someone who is involved in a conversation.

On the fly (idiom) - if you do something on the fly, you do it quickly, often while you are doing something else, without preparing and without thinking too much about how it should be done.

To guide (verb) - to influence someone's behaviour.

Solemn (adj.) - serious and without any humour.

Terminally (adverb) - if someone or something is terminally stupid, boring, etc., they are extremely stupid, boring, etc. and that will not change.

Anecdotal evidence (noun) - evidence in the form of stories that people tell about what has happened to them.

To back something up (phrasal verb) - to prove something is true.

Biased (adj.) - showing an unreasonable like or dislike for someone or something based on personal opinions.

Broad (adj.) - including many types of things; general.

Questions and Answers

M: Why might it be good to be talkative?

R: Well, thinking about it logically, two heads are better than one. So by talking things through with someone else, then things can be easier to solve. It gives you a kind of sounding board for ideas as well as an additional source of them, and experience, now I think about it.

M: What communication skills does a talkative person have?

R: Well, ironically, probably having active listening skills might be the most important of them, since you're more focused on what your interlocutor is saying, and that will inform your responses more effectively. Being good at planning on the fly can also be helpful since you can see where the conversation is going and think of ways to guide and continue it.

M: What kinds of professions involve* talking to groups of people?

R: Well, teaching seems like the most obvious one to me, having done it for the past 10 years, but there are others like performers who have to entertain en mass and anyone who gives presentations for people, like a manager. There must be a central concept determining that but I can't think of it right now.

M: How should parents encourage their children to express themselves when they are asked questions they're afraid to answer?

R: Well, setting a good example would seem like a good place to start. So demonstrating this lack of fear, and also an ability to cope with things like that. It would give them something to see and experience which they can copy. Since children have so many random questions, I imagine it wouldn't be hard to do, to be honest.

M: Why do some children talk more than their peers?

R: For the same reason that happens in adults, I would imagine. Everyone has different preferences and has been encouraged to different extents. And with that in mind, I don't even know what the main reasons might be. Maybe they just aren't interested in talking to other people or their parents didn't encourage this in them.

M: On what occasions should the child talk less than usual?

R: Probably the same times people are quiet in general, like when someone's talking and they have something important to say, or when it's a solemn occasion, like a wedding or a funeral. The culture and context usually determine this more broadly speaking, to be honest.

M: And should children be encouraged to talk more?

R: I think that depends on the child and where they're growing up, to be honest. Like for example, say that you've got a child who is terminally shy, then it will be important to encourage them to talk more, assuming the culture values this kind of talkative behaviour. But if it doesn't, or if the child talks a regular amount, then it's not so important.

M: Are people talkative in your country?

R: I would probably say more so than most of the other countries I have been to. This is just based on anecdotal evidence. I have no statistics to back that up. It just seems like people in my country talk more, but then I know them better than people from other countries. So I'm biased.

M: Do you agree that communication skills can't be learned?

R: Well, I mean, communication skills is a huge area. So, no, I don't agree. Because it depends on what kind of skills we're talking about. And who we're talking about developing them in. So that question is far too broad, or that statement is far too broad to have any accuracy.

Discussion

M: Right. So talkative people. Rory, first of all, what synonyms can we have for talkative?

R: Chatterbox.

M: Yeah. Talkative, like a person is a chatterbox. Blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. All the time. Like talks nonstop. And a chatbox is usually negative, yeah? Oh, he's a chatterbox.

R: It's funny because you put me on the spot now and I cannot think of any other ways to talk about people who are talkative.

M: I think chatty.

R: Chatty Cathy. That might not be an expression to use. My best friend says that all the time whenever I'm being quiet. He always says like, alright, Chatty Cathy. But I don't know if that's an expression or not. Hold on. Let me just check that.

M: No, no, regional Scottish slang, dear listener. You don't want that. So usually, around the world, people say chatty people.

R: Well, it's not a regional thing, actually, because I've just typed it in there. And Chatty Cathy was a doll that was manufactured in America, I think, actually. And so this idea of being like the doll that talks all the time is not something that is isolated to my country. Oh, it's made by the same company that made Barbie. How about that?

M: So yeah, usually just talkative people - chatty people. Like chatterbox, like, oh, I have a friend who is a real chatterbox.

R: Who is a real Chatty Cathy? I'm bringing that phrase back. I love it.

M: Just, dear listener, don't bother with Cathy Chatty.

R: Don't bother with Cathy.

M: Yeah, it's just... Yeah. Also, wordy. You can say like, if a person is wordy, but that's negative. That means like, a lot of words. So a person that gives like long answers, for example. May not be relevant to the topic. Oh, like no, like you are too wordy, containing many words. So it might be a good idea to be talkative. Because two heads are better than one. So like two people are better than one. And it's helpful if you talk things through with someone. So you talk them through, you're talkative, you let it out. And the things can be easier to solve. And, like talking it through with somebody is a kind of sounding board for ideas. What is this? A sounding board.

R: Well, a person would be a sounding board. But that's just, it's an expression for someone that you... Someone that you talk to about ideas or someone that you bounce ideas off.

M: So if I talk things through with you, you are my sounding board for ideas.

R: Yeah.

M: And is it usually like people? Like somebody is a sounding board?

R: Someone is a sounding board, yeah, or somebody acts like a sounding board.

M: Yeah. So if you want to discuss something with, like your friends, your friend is a sounding board for ideas. You brainstorm ideas, you talk things through. Talkative people have different communication skills, right? So they can't shut up. They just keep talking. So they have active listening skills. So they listen to you and respond. Okay? And Rory, ironically, talkative people have active listening skills.

R: Well, it would be a skill that they should have. But that's because they need to listen and then return what is said to them as well.

M: And who is an interlocutor?

R: An interlocutor is the person that you talk to.

M: Yes, dear listener. So when you talk to a person, this person is your interlocutor. Well, you can also say your friend, or a person you talk to, or you can use this specific word, your interlocutor.

R: Interlocutor is definitely a band nine word.

M: Oh, yeah, yeah. So it's important to understand what your interlocutor is saying or is telling you. So when you use tell, remember to use you. What your friend is telling you, or what your friend is saying. Also being good at planning on the fly. So when you plan what you say on the fly. On the fly? You don't have any plan, you just speak on the fly, with no preparation before that, just like do it on the fly. Unprepared.

R: You make it up as you go along.

M: Like, you should be able to make it up as you go along. Like without a pre-planned speech. And a talkative person usually sees where this conversation is going. Right? So is it going well, if it's not going well, so what could be the end of the conversation? Like a positive outcome, negative? A talkative person knows how to guide a conversation, and how to continue a conversation. Also kind of how to do turn-taking. Can I say that?

R: I think it's just how to take your turn, really. That's what I would say or taking your turn appropriately.

M: How to take your turn? Like I see something then I ask a question. Rory asks something. So it's like pinball. Yes? Like, take your turn. Like what jobs, what professions involve talking to people? Hmm...

R: Well, if you're a teacher, then you just say that. I think most people have experienced teaching, either being a teacher or as a student. And so it's the easiest one to reach for. I even said that. It's like, it seems like the most obvious one to me.

M: Yeah, like teaching is the most obvious profession. Also performers, and actors, right? And then, like, people, like anyone who gives presentations for people. Like managers who are involved in public speaking. Also politicians, sales managers, and lecturers at university, obviously.

R: Well, I thought you were... I thought you were about to move on to the next question. I was like, why are we not asking the next question, but you were thinking about people who talk for a living.

M: So parents should encourage their children to express themselves. So to express themselves with the help of words. So if a child is afraid to answer a question, how can they express themselves? Okay? And how should parents help them to express themselves?

R: They can show the skill. It's a good place to start.

M: What do you mean they can show the skill?

R: They can... Like their children can experience their parents in this situation and respond to it confidently. And that's quite a good example to set.

M: Yeah. Setting a good example is the solution. So when parents actually answer the question, and the child sees how a parent does it. And again, Rory starts answering this question in a similar way to how he's answered the previous question. Setting a good example would seem like a good place to start. And the previous question was, teaching seems like the most obvious profession. Yeah? So like doing something is blah. Yeah?

R: And it's a good thing to do. Because the idea that you have and the idea that the examiner has might be completely different. In the same way, if you're talking to someone in real life, and you're like, oh, well, this seems like the most obvious way to do something. It means that you are giving your idea but you're also saying it just seems this way. It's maybe not the best way.

M: Yeah. So you're like very careful, cautious. Like an effective politician. So kind of, this seems to be the answer. This seems to work. This seems like a good place to start. So children should be able to cope with things. So deal with things, cope with things with confidence. And some children talk more than their peers. Peers? Like classmates. Like their friends. Usually of the same age. Obviously like friends of children. Okay? And here, Rory tells us that, well, it depends. Everyone has different preferences. Okay? And I don't even know what the main reasons might be. There you go. If you don't know, yeah.

R: Just say, I don't even know.

M: Like children are not interested in talking. So when children are interested, they talk, when they're not interested they don't talk.

R: They don't.

M: Easy. Yeah. When they have nothing to say, they don't talk. When they have something to say, well, they can be shy.

R: Everyone should be more like the children, to be honest. Because there are some people, especially when they're nervous that just fill the air with words and you're like, oh, my God, stop talking.

M: Yeah, just like random chatter. Chatter, like... About everything. Sometimes a child should talk less than usual. Yeah? Because some children are quite chatty. They're really talkative.

R: They're Chatty Cathy's.

M: No.

R: I'm having too much fun with this.

M: Yeah, for example, if it's a solemn occasion, like a wedding, like a funeral. Yeah? So a solemn occasion, like a serious event, like an official event, a funeral or a wedding. Also, the culture and context usually determine how much a child should talk.

R: That's true for almost everything, though. I mean, the culture and context determines how much a child should talk or what's appropriate to cook or the number of flowers to send somebody. It all revolves around that, which is why it's an easy thing to deploy for any answer. And it's quite a high level, I think. Culture and context, determine, more broadly. Pretty good. And this for referring back to the question.

M: Some children might be terminally shy. Terminally? Like really shy, like they are born shy. Yes?

R: Well, no. It's just like, they're so shy that it's a disaster for them. You can be terminally shy, terminally silly, or terminally stupid. It just means that you're so stupid or shy that you just can't function.

M: Yeah. Sometimes we also say, people are terminally ill, like they're seriously ill. When the examiner asks you about your country, like, are people talkative in your country? Do people do this in your country? You can say that, well, I don't have the statistics. So most people are talkative. But this is based on anecdotal evidence. So what's anecdotal evidence?

R: It's just evidence that you hear about from stories that you might share with your friends or in society. There's no way to know for sure if it's true or not. Generally.

M: Yeah, you don't have the numbers, you don't have any like official research, statistics. It's just like from, you know, from people. And you can criticize the question. So like can communication skills be learned? Or kind of you are born with communication skills, for example. And you cannot be taught how to be an effective communicator. You can say, well, this question is too broad, like it's too general. So you can say like, this question is far too broad. Like, I don't have an answer. And then like, Rory said something, I don't know, general.

R: Well, the statement is far too broad. Because the idea that it's like, you can't teach communication skills and like, well, communication skills, that covers a lot of ground, and the idea that you cannot do any of it for anybody at any time, and it's just impossible is probably not true. There's usually some kind of circumstance where it's possible.

M: And communication skills is a broad term, right? Like, it contains a lot of things. Like active listening, friendliness, confidence, sharing feedback, and respect. So there are lots of skills in communication skills. It's not just one thing, right? So it's kind of this umbrella term, which contains a lot of mini skills. So like, what do you mean?

R: Yeah. Which ones? Specifically which ones? I want to know.

M: Which skills? Yeah.

R: You cannot attack the examiner, though. You can't just say, oh, my God, which ones? You'd have to say like, I don't know what ones you mean.

M: Yeah. But like a good strategy could be like, this question is far too broad. And then you can say, like if you mean...

R: Well, if you mean, can you teach someone to speak like, you know, a politician that's... That's like the president of a country, probably not in a short space of time. No, that is something that you gather over years of experience, and some people never succeed.

M: Yeah. Because compared to Obama's communication skills and my communication skills. Okay? I'm not sure I can speak publicly like Obama. Okay, Rory, would you like to comment on something else?

R: Well, yeah. There are a couple of things to spot. One is about vocabulary because again, I go to webinars and I listen to what people who design the exam say, and they talk about the usefulness of collocations, which are words that commonly appear together. So Maria, can you see any collocations in what I had to say about talking?

M: Right. So, for example, talk things through with someone. That's good collocation.

R: A central concept.

M: This will inform your responses. This will give information for you to respond.

R: An ability to cope. Especially cope with things.

M: Yeah, you see? Kind of like these words go well together.

R: Oh, to different extents, or encouraged to different extent. That's pretty good. Interested in talking. Or just that's kind of colligation. Interested in plus -ing. A solemn occasion.

M: Oh, yeah. A solemn occasion. Yeah, like a solemn event, like a funeral or wedding. Thank you very much for listening!

R: We'll see you in the next episode!

M: Bye!

R: Bye!

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